What You Don’t See On Instagram

Most people probably know that Instagram isn’t a good representation of real life, but it’s easy to get caught up in an idea of what your life should look like, especially while scrolling through other people’s picture-perfect ‘grams.

A few weeks ago, I was talking to my husband about one of my friends who has a baby a few months older than Izzy. “Her baby always looks so happy,” I said, scrolling through her pictures. “And her life is so together. How is that possible?”

“Anyone could say the same thing about you,” he pointed out. And, until that moment, I hadn’t really thought of that.

It’s true that I spend a lot of time on social media, and, on more than one occasion, I’ve said something along the lines of, “Nah I’m not gonna post that because it doesn’t fit with my Instagram aesthetic.” A quick scroll through my IG might lead you to believe that my apartment is always clean, my baby is always laughing, and everything is perfectly filtered.

The truth? Not so much. So, with the theme of honesty in mind, here are some things that you don’t see on my Instagram…but it doesn’t mean they don’t exist.


I’m talking about my baby’s crying (and yes, mine too). Sure, you might see a video where she’s smiling during tummy time, but the reality is that she smiled for two seconds and then started screaming because she hates tummy time, and then cried for the next five minutes until she forgot she had been on her tummy. You don’t see that.

Nap battles

Those pictures of Izzy sleeping serenely in her DockATot on my IG story? They don’t include the 20 minutes it took to get her down, complete with lots of wailing. (Today, for example, she’s barely napped at all.)

Messy, unwashed hair

I barely have time to wash my hair these days, and when I do, I never, ever blowdry it. It usually ends up in a messy bun by 10 a.m.

And a messy, unwashed apartment

That one corner where I take a photo is not representative of the whole.

Rushed (and probably unhealthy) meals.

And all the cold coffee. So much cold coffee.

Moments of doubt.

Am I doing this right? Am I even a good mom? These are questions I ask myself no less than ten times a day. It’s hard to have confidence 24/7, especially with something as difficult and foreign as parenthood. And I’d be willing to bet a lot of other people — yes, even those with picture-perfect Instagram feeds — feel the same way.

Featured Photo: Courtesy of Unsplash

One thought on “What You Don’t See On Instagram

  1. De-
    Such a powerful and important message here! I think about what my life “should” be like all the time as a new mom- and its just not that way. There’s tons of crying in the bathroom because its the only place I can be alone, cursing as I crunch over cheerio crumbs on my dirty floors, and zombie shuffling through the night in our house too. Kudos to you for sharing what life is really like each day. Little Izzy will definitely know the value of honesty with a great mama like you!

    Liked by 1 person

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